Better

This past weekend was fantastic. I was so happy that Josh was able to come up, even if it was only for 2 days. I love when I get to see him. It puts me in such a better mood. We were able to go to a couple stores and do our wedding registry. It was a little overwhelming at first but a lot of fun. We did get a little carried away, but hey why not? There is so much stuff that you don't think about, especially since we're not living together yet. Josh and I kept fighting over who got to control the scanner. I'm glad we got that out of the way. It's another thing I can check off my list.

Since Josh was able to come up this weekend I made myself a promise. I promised myself that after he left this weekend I would try and control my emotions/stress better. I, unfortunately, let myself get to a point where everything was overwhelming. I let little things get to me that should have just rolled off my back and I ended up spazzing out by the end of everyday. I know that I cannot do this anymore. Of course, not seeing Josh is still going to be extremely hard. But I know for my sanity (and his) I need to do this. I need to do better. I need to stop and breathe and just relax. Things will get better. Yes, it does suck that we're not together right now. But in the long run it is all worth it and we will be together.

We have been together 2 years and although I have been through 2 deployments, I consider myself very lucky. I am lucky because Josh will be on shore duty the first 2-3 years of our marriage. I don't have to worry about another deployment for a while and that makes me so happy. I will be use to living on our own before he gets another deployment when and if he re-enlists after this enlistment.

I know that moving away from my family is going to be hard. I am not even going to pretend that I will make an easy transition. But I know Josh will be there to support me and help me through. I guess this is why a large part of me hopes he will get stationed here on the east coast. So we will be closer to our families. But that is not guarantee and I'm not holding my breath. Whatever is meant to happen will happen. I am excited though, for what our life together will bring.